“Weird Goodbyes” by The National (ft. Bon Iver)
The National’s “Weird Goodbyes”, which is presumably romantic in nature, speaks to an emotional experience many of us may go through. And that is, based on Matt’s explanation, proceeding to break up with somebody, only to realize later down the line that doing so may have been a mistake.
There are certain parts of the song which seem to do an ample job of implying that such is the thesis sentiment of this piece. The aforementioned parts can be found in the first and third verses.
However, there are other sections which are so heavily symbolic that it may prove more challenging to ascertain what the vocalist is getting at. For instance, the term “weird goodbyes” is never clearly defined. But it should also be pointed out that overall, what’s being put forth has somewhat of a nostalgic feel. The singer is apparently implying throughout that there’s certain things, even raindrops on his car’s windshield, that freshly remind him of a past relationship.
Indeed, it appears what’s actually being relayed here basically is him ending a relationship and immediately coming to regret taking such an action.
“The grief it gets me, the weird goodbyes
My car is creepin’, I think it’s dyin’
I’m pullin’ over until it heals
I’m on a shoulder of lemon fields”
The Collaboration
It has been noted that this is The National’s first collaboration with Bon Iver. Furthermore, this is also the first time they’ve ever teamed up with an outside male vocalist in general. It was actually Aaron Dessner, the band’s main guitarist, who invited said vocalist, Justin Vernon, to participate.
It should also be noted that Dessner and Vernon are in fact regular collaborators. The pair even went on to start their own act known as Big Red Machine.
Credits for “Weird Goodbyes”
Aaron Dessner co-wrote “Weird Goodbyes” alongside his bandmate, Matt Berninger (who acts as lead vocalist on the track). The entire National is credited, as a singular entity, with producing the song.
Dessner revealed that the song was birthed as a result of him just playing with drum machines. According to him, while messing around with the drum machines, he accidentally met with a beat that he really loved. The song was subsequently built around this beat.
Release of “Weird Goodbyes”
This track was released on 22 August 2022. At the time of its release, it was a standalone single.
There’s a young family referenced in the song, and a wish to remember its times. I hear someone being haunted by loss
As much i read and listen the lyrics, the more I think the song is not romantical in Nature, instead the narrator is a father who is missing his already grown up daughter, overcome bye grief ot the weird goodbye when she mover puta from the family Home. The metaphors make more sense in this context
YES! That’s what I think too. Could be because I’m dealing with those “empty nest” feelings with kids away at college. But, that’s the magic of music – it can speak to people differently.
Yeah, I think it makes the most sense from the perspective of a father and husband, and some damaged relationships. There’s “memorize the bathwater, memorize the air, there’ll come a time I want to know I was here”, and especially “names on the door frames, inches and ages, hand prints in concrete at the softest stages”.
I got a sense of dementia in the lyrics.
Weird goodbyes could be from both sides, grieving before the actual loss. The sort of distorted feelings towards names, inches and ages.
Especially with the kind of back and forth between the two voices it’s like telling the same story from each perspective.
Thats a great point thanks, totally missed it. Reference to “Sorrow”.
Got this sense as well. For me it’s totally about memory loss and the struggle to help it. Made me think of the movie “Still Alice”, for instance.
It’s about a break up and everything that they dreamt as a couple and realising all of that is gone and missing the idea of what they could have been. And just the memories of the things they did together and how all of it turned into nothing. A sad song
To me personally it felt like it was about the loss of a sibling, that was just my own interpretation. Like other said, it really is so interesting to see how different people interpret song lyrics! 🙂
This I exactly what it means for me. Just a week after this songs release my sibling was hospitalized. I knew she was going to die and I struggled with myself about going to say goodbye but I didn’t want to remember her on her death bed. Despite being siblings our relationship as adults was difficult but we still had that “chemistry” the song speaks of. She’s gone now and I have regrets but I can’t go back and I’m left with this numb ache of what could have been. This song *feels* like it was written for me. 😥
If life hands you lemon fields, make lemonade
I feel the song is more about a failing marriage, and the loss of the idea of family that so many people experience while going through divorce. . There are many references to the idea of failing , not trying hard enough and the proverbial “tossing in the towel”, as well as the guilt and second guessing that comes with this process The “Weird Goodbyes” I believe are indicative of the awkwardness in interactions with a partner of a failed relationship and all the difficulty and pain that it comes with.
EXACTLY
I agree as well. Astute observation, but I also think it’s a well-written song that’s malleable and speaks to grief and loss in its many forms.
This is exactly how it hits me too. Missing your kids and ex spouse. Especially the bit about the coat. I remember when I got divorced I’d realize I left some belonging behind but I just “let go” of it because I didn’t want to have to get it back from the ex.