“How Do I Say Goodbye” by Dean Lewis

“How Do I Say Goodbye” is a touching song in which, as explained by Dean Lewis, the vocalist is mourning his dying father, which honestly is not a particular theme we come across often. But as presented in this case, the addressee, i.e. Dean’s dying father, was someone who had a constant presence throughout his entire life.

You can view the lyrics, alternate interprations and sheet music for Dean Lewis's How Do I Say Goodbye at Lyrics.org.

His father meant so much to him that the prospect of the addressee passing is something which the singer cannot conceptualize. And such is this song’s thesis sentiment, i.e. Dean’s emotions being such that he can’t even conceive ‘how to say goodbye’ to his dad. Moreover, he is using the opportunity to let him know, most frankly put, that he doesn’t want him to die.

And yes, by the time all is said and done, even if not stated forthrightly, it can be ascertained that the addressee is indeed the vocalist’s father. Accordingly Dean’s mom, who is still around, also plays a role in it all. And one thing the singer does assure his passing father of is that he will take care of her in his absence.

Of course no matter what, Dean is never going to forget his dad. How can he, when he beholds his features even while looking in the mirror? So again, if nothing else, this song is unique in that we have a vocalist identifiable mourning his pops.

“So how do I say goodbye
To someone’s who’s been with me for my whole damn life?
You gave me my name and the color of your eyes
I see your face when I look at mine
So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye?
So how do I, how do I, how do I say goodbye?”

Dean Lewis

Dean Lewis appears to be a musical A lister in his homeland of Australia, as earlier in his career he dropped a number of tracks that have reached multi-platinum status down under. For instance, the biggest hit in his discography, 2018’s “Be Alright“, has been certified 11-times platinum as of 2022. But thus far he’s only dropped one LP, that being 2019’s “A Place We Knew”.

“How Do I Say Goodbye”

“How Do I Say Goodbye” was globally released on the 2nd of September 2022. It is one of the singles from his second studio album.

It would appear that Dean Lewis debuted this song sometime around mid-2022. 

To note, the above analysis is of lyrics gathered from snippets as well as live performances.

How Do I Say Goodbye

Dean Lewis’ Father

Dean wrote “How Do I Say Goodbye” shortly after his father was diagnosed with cancer. That said, virtually no information is readily available on his father, and as you can see, Dean didn’t really go about expressing any personal details about him in the lyrics. But he did upload an Instagram post in mid-August, briefly explaining the background behind “How Do I Say Goodbye”. 

And as relayed, his father received a very-bleak cancer diagnosis some time ago, in which they were told that there was a very slim chance he would survive another year. Well apparently Terence did endure significantly longer than that timeframe. According to Dean, he was ‘always his best friend and the person he looked up to the most’. Therefore, he proceeded to drop this track in his remembrance.

Dean Lewis talks about "How Do I Say Goodbye"

NOTE: Dean’s father lived to see the release of this song. Dean later revealed via Instagram that his father loved the song.

Words from Fans

This beautiful ode to Lewis’ father has touched the hearts of many who have been through the same situation.

A fan, who had lost his dad in October 2021, thanked Lewis profusely for this song. According to him, the lyrics are exactly what he’s been trying to express.

Another fan wrote that ever since his grandparents died last year and he didn’t have the chance to say goodbye to them, he hasn’t been able to accept that they’re gone. He continued by saying that he’s positive this track will help him let go as Lewis’ songs have helped him through tough times.

Another staunch fan expressed that “How Do I Say Goodbye” is their safe place. At the time of commenting, their grandpa, who’s been like a father, is dying. After being raised by him, they have learnt the values their grandpa passed down. The song fits their current situation.

Please Share Your Personal Stories with Us

Below are some very touching personal stories fans of this song (“How Do I Say Goodbye”) have shared with the world. Feel free to share yours with us too. Thanks.

Witnessed Heaven

“I witnessed something truly remarkable at the Enmore Theatre in Sydney, Australia. Dean performed this tune with his father, and it was one of the most emotional moments of my life. I was moved to tears and could hardly keep myself together. I got chills all over my body. I could feel emotions everywhere in the packed hall. It was such a beautiful and touching moment, one that I will never forget.”

– Martin

Lewis Capaldi and his Dad performing “How Do I Say Goodbye” live in Sydney.
“How Do I Say Goodbye”, A Song that Highlights How Fragile Life Is

“I will never forget the moment when Dean’s ‘How Do I Say Goodbye’ came on the radio during a road trip. I had to pull over to the side of the road. This song was completely new to me at the time, but it hit me real hard. My mother’s cancer has returned after a year of remission, and I am struggling to come to terms with it.

This song reminded me that we might have to say goodbye to her soon. It’s a challenging time for me right now, and I needed to express how much this song touched me. The song highlights the fragility of life, and how we never know when our time on this earth will be over. It emphasizes that death is inevitable, and yet there is never a right way or time to say goodbye.

It also reminds me that I am not alone, and many people have gone through the same thing and have found a way to keep going. So, I will keep listening to it, find comfort in its lyrics and hold onto hope even when things seem bleak. I know that someday, somehow, I will find a way to say goodbye to my mother with love and grace.”

– Phillipa

Feels Like “How Do I Say Goodbye” was Composed for Me

“It looks like the duo Dean Lewis and Jon Hume had my family in mind when they composed this song. My husband is dying of cancer, and the disease has spread to his lungs already. It’s a cruel reality we have to face, and we don’t know how to break the news to our kids.

They don’t deserve this, and my heart breaks at the thought of them growing up without a father. I am worried about how to break the news to the kids and how I will bring them up alone. The emotions I go through whenever I hear it play is unimaginable.”

– A Heartbroken Mother and Wife  

A Song That Reminds Me of My Greatest Fear In Life

“‘How Do I Say Goodbye’ exposes my greatest fear of losing a loved one. It reminds me that life is delicate, and we never know when our time will come to an end. It urges me to hold onto my loved ones, especially my dad, and treasure every moment we have together.

Despite my dad’s current good health, the song fills me with fear at the thought of losing him someday. I recognize that death is a part of life, and I can only hope to have the courage to face the pain whenever I lose a loved one.”

– Abena Fosua

29 Responses

  1. Anonymous says:

    his late father ?
    Dean Lewis recently shared on social media, “And I was luckily enough to show him this song as he is now in remission!!! (He said he loves the song but can’t listen to it more than once 🤣)”

  2. Jerry says:

    not ashamed to admit i started crying when i heard this song for the first time after i lost my dad on cancer 4 months ago… The lyrics are so spot on..

  3. H says:

    Sorry for your loss Jerry x

  4. Kaycee says:

    7 years ago I got a similar call from my mum. My dad was in his final moments. I held his hands as I saw a tears fall from his eyes and he drew his final breath. It’s so hard typing this, tears won’t let me see but it’s hard to say goodbye to my best friend. He was the best father a son could ever have.

  5. Anonymous says:

    Sorry for your loss. I lost my grandpa in the same way.

  6. Anonymous says:

    Omg i cried when i heard this song i lost my great nan in the same way and the lyrics are spot on!

  7. Anonymous says:

    So sad

  8. Anonymous says:

    OMG..tears of gratitude for helping us express what many can’t. Lost my brothers and father, dad was terminal told he would live 18 months, lived 12 years. I wrote a poem “how do I say goodbye” when my younger brother passed and this about brought me to my knees!

  9. Anonymous says:

    Lost my dad yesterday morning. We knew he was dying and the evening before he asked me what my thoughts were. I didn’t dare to speak, didn’t know what to say. I loved you dad, sorry for not telling you.

  10. shaynen walker says:

    I lost mum Dad in 2017 and i miss him

  11. Heather says:

    My youngest son sent me this beautiful song recently, he said it fitted perfectly with how he feels about his Dad, we lost my dear husband in January this year, we all love him & miss him terribly, how do we say goodbye to someone we love so so much ? Thank you Dean

  12. Miss Him says:

    I lost my dad five years ago. I still don’t know how to say goodbye. It hurts every day. I miss him so so much. I didn’t get to say goodbye. Can’t believe it’s been five years. This song is so beautiful and is spot on. Rest in peace dad.

  13. Sparx says:

    I’m certain this song touches many of us that have experienced the actual loss. It’s been 6 years since I lost my Father. He was healthy and vibrant however he died suddenly shocking all of us. The Finest Man I’ve ever known and Loved by everyone that knew him. Although I never did get a chance to say goodbye, I still talk to him every single day. We don’t get to choose our Parents and I’m eternally grateful for the Father that chose me . . .

  14. S Stone says:

    My mom is in late stages of Cancer 💔 Listening to this song for the first time while watching my mom sleep….broke me down 😭How do you say goodbye to your best friend? 😫

  15. gabbie says:

    I love that song its helped me get over my father’s death

  16. Jenny says:

    We recently lost our son because of a accident. We weren’t able to say goodbye to him. We promises him to look after his 27 year old widow and his small son of one and a half years old the same way as Dean promised to look after his mother. Our son was 32 years 😢. Every day is still a fight to keep going for our 4 other sons, his widow and his little boy 🥺😢

  17. Anonymous says:

    My mom and I shared breast cancer IVD 2 she was in her 80’s, I was 41 newly divorced beat it for 10 years and now I’m in 2 yrs of metastasized bone cancer every vertebrae 5 cracked, all but 2 have tumors and 2 on my skull. Chemo/immunotherapy 21 days a month and one day at the oncologist for 2 treatments. I’m doing well. I have 2 girls one working directly with an oncologist as his MMA and will be his RN BSN next year , my other daughter is 30 a vibrant, baker, chef, kind, loving, dog lover, famous to our Amazon drivers 🤦‍♀️ She drives around town. She is Autistic but, it does not define fine. I have been advocating for her as a single mom their entire life . They love each other and my youngest will take care of her sister when it comes. I will fight this to the end. 5 yrs ago I would have died. Progress every day. You story of your song touched me. Thank you my dear and may you and your family be blessed

  18. Sadness overtakes me says:

    My brother left my mum and me,( I’m his sister, I’m the middle child) and he left my family because his girlfriend’s baby boy has a condition that makes him not be able to speak and walk properly, ( i think it’s called PKYS, something like that), and he has a lot of seizures and once me, my 2 sisters and my mum where looking after him, and my mum is super scared if he would have a seizure that day, and my brother’s girlfriend thought we left him in bed all day , ( but it was just bc my mum was scared) but we didn’t, and now he hates us and this song reminds me so much of his stupidity 😭. And we haven’t seen them in about 2 year.

  19. Anonymous says:

    It makes me sad beacause i lost my best friend and i dont know what do do know.

  20. Lily says:

    When I was 3 I had a dog named Patches and he got into something that made him get very sick and he went blind and he was slowly dying he was the best dog and sometimes when I look at the dog I have now I think of Patches and sometimes I cry and then hug him

  21. Anonymous says:

    I’m always feeling kinda down cause i only get to visit my biological mother once a year and saying bye is always hard

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